Although we don’t like to see ourselves in this situation and we usually ignore it when it’s at the threshold of our life, we welcome it as one of our guests during the happiest moment of our existence. The problem creeps in when all our amusing guest leaves, and this “situation” overstays as a guest in the ambiance of our happiness, slowly engulfing all the roses in the garden, leaving all the thorns behind. This typical situation that I am referring to is of course, the situation of “being ignored by someone”. As stated before, lots of people come in our life, they become an amusing companion in the journey towards finding the meaning of our life, they make us laugh, they make us accomplish things that can only be attained by working together, and most important of all, they teach us the joy of sharing.
In the course of meeting all these people, we run into someone who is absolutely different from the crowd and with whose every breath, we feel torn apart from nature and its cool breeze, only to breathe in together with the one we love. In the midst of all that is happening with us and how fortunate we feel that that someone was made especially for us, there is no contemplation of what will happen when they leave us? What will happen if one day you wake up and find that your loved one is not near you, and you realize he’s not going to be near you forever?
It would be wrong to indulge in affairs of love and all its shortcomings because love is always a beautiful thing. Yet with all the lovely shades true love possesses, there is an abysmal depth of pain in this particular situation of our lives. I’ve seen an ample amount of people break apart with this feeling, I’ve seen them embrace the touch of death, and worst of all, I saw them crying themselves to bed every night. To all the people out there who are facing the worst pages in the novels of their existence and experiencing pain that reminds them again and again about the brevity of life, I want to tell them to stop punishing themselves; I want them to stop polishing the shoes that are never going to shine again. “When someone ignores you, it can be a devastating feeling and it can affect your life in such magnitudes that you will feel that your life does not make any sense. But that does not denote that you have to ignore yourself, it does not denote that you have to ease yourself off with the poisons of abandonment. You have to love yourself in order to make other people love you.”
It is just so surreal and strange that people always point their finger at the other person for the grief that has been caused upon them. Maybe in the case of an assault, exploitation, or any particular physical damage incurred upon you where you can directly claim your life has been miserable due to their devious manner. But when it is about love and its mental torture, you cannot accuse the other person of ignoring you; you cannot accuse them of lying to you because whatever their action is against you, it is mainly a reaction to the actions you have taken. Even if you feel that the opposite person is at fault and all the sufferings you endured can’t be possible because you have always put forward a nice disposition, still then, don’t blame the other person for ignoring you. Our life is too short if you indulge it in blame-gaming, instead, look at the other person and try to gather what is really wrong, what has caused this breakage in the boat of relationship? What has become so overplayed that the strings of your relationship have broken?
If you look closely into yourself and not in the life of the other person, you will find all the answers you are looking for. Remember that a person is never born ignorant and also remember that every person is capable of experiencing love. It all sums up to how you treat each other, if your love was never meant to be, it won’t exist no matter what you do. Look closely at yourself and ask yourself this “Is it really worth it?” If you truly value your life and you believe that you are “different” than other people, then you will strive to exist. And in the continuum of your existence, you will move on and you will see other people. And then someone from the crowd will coincidentally find you “different”. As mentioned before, you will fall in love, you will engage in an attachment that will be unshaken by the ever-changing world except you and your partner’s ever-changing desires. Then at that exact moment, realize what you have been through and what you have promised yourself, and although the gash will be the same and the pain yet deeper, you will feel you have the drive to exist and exist you will.
“Shed tears in the absence of love,
For it may not come again,
Laugh while you’re filled with love,
For it may not find you again.”
All in all, keep in mind that you are because you have been; you will be, because you are going to be. Your destiny is in your own hands, and while you continue to live in isolation and solitude, remembers that life has much more to offer. Don’t deny it.
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